Log in

No account? Create an account

Not that anybody will read this,

but Evan made a friend! That's actually his age!

I'm relieved, to be honest...it gets scary, being alone in high school. And now it's like, I have an ally? He's not new or anything, but his schedule just got switched around 'cause people wouldn't stop fucking with him. He's actually way awesome, too. He likes sci-fi, and books, and once I presented my case, he agrees that Tom Cruise is an alien. (His name is Jack, by the way...poor kid gets TONS of 'jack off' jokes.) Unfortunately, he's not as big a fan of the classics as I am. He apparently hated Catcher in the Rye, and never even read To Kill A Mockingbird. (No idea how he managed that-it's required reading for freshmen, and you have to take a test on it.)

I haven't told him I'm gay yet. The subject really just hasn't come up...he's a cool guy anyway, it shouldn't bother him at all.

Everything is looking up lately. Even mom has been less bitchy. (Though she's started telling me I need a girlfriend. Oh, if only she knew...)

I have nothing else to say and don't want to start rambling about books like I'm tempted to.

Byeeeeeeeeeeeee, LJ! :D

So right now I'm in my room, as usual, and Kain and Iris are behind me, getting their gross straight couple-y cuteness all over my bed. No, seriously. They're cuddling and kissing and just being really sickeningly adorable. And I love them both and they're amazing people and really fun and god damnit i resent them so much. -_________- They get to be happy and in love and what does Evan get? Beat up 5 days a week.

I'm so depressed lately. I'm just sick of everything. It's not just being single-though that's a part of it. It's my mom's bitchiness getting to me, and being sick of everyone's bullshit with me. It's like I just have this giant target painted on my back. It was bad enough at my old school, but when we moved to Glendale it just got ten times worse. I mean...at least I had friends back there. Here, it's like....my first day at this school someone walked up to me and was like, "Hey...are you gay?" And at first I was like '.....why would you ask that?' but I didn't want to lie so I went "Uh...yeah. I am." And that was really stupid because the dude punched me in the face.

I hate this place. I want to move, again. Or just get a streak of good luck, mine's been bad for long enough.

Sorry for the whining, guys. I'm just...sick of this. Ugh.



I went out to lunch with dad, because that's what we do, and we talked, and...
I kindasorta told him!

Except.......he kindasorta has known for fucking MONTHS. T______T

We were just sitting in this little diner, which is where we usually go, and while we were eating I was just like, "HeydadguesswhatI'mgay."
I was expecting him to, I don't know, choke on his fries or something. But guess what? He didn't.

He said, "I know. In November your principal called me and talked to me, he said you were being made fun of for your sexuality and that it was really getting to be a big problem."

I was so pissed. WTF Why didn't he tell me?! WHY DIDN'T HE SPARE ME THE AGONY OF HAVING TO TELL HIM?!!??!?!
When I asked him that he was all calm and he just said "Well I wanted you to be ready to tell me, is all."

adfl;aksdf;askdjfsrsly ;_;

I lovers my dad. So muchhh. He's so cool, seriously. Not many straight guys are actually okay with gays, or so understanding, and just...
he's so cool!

How the fuck did he end up with my mom?

Fuck valentine's day.

Devon and Scott have a party, Dad's at a work thing, Kain (almost) got some, and what am I doing?

Sitting at home on my fucking computer feeling sorry for myself.

I hate valentine's day.
I hate being single.
I hate being 'the school fag,' even though I'm not a flamer.
I REALLY hate my mother. But that's not new.

Bleh. I wish I had better social skills. I wish I knew how to meet guys. Or make more friends. It's very rare that I will click with someone the way me and Kain did.

I wish I weren't so fucking nervous at the mere idea of telling Dad that I'm gay. :\ Ugh.

i hate my life.
if i'm still single on valentine's day next year, there will be a massacre.

Lol i forgot about this thing. >.>

Well, not really. Just like...posting in it.

Plus I've been doing homework the past couple days. For some reason every single teacher's been piling it on. >.< I've barely had time to sleep, let alone get on LJ and fuck around.

So last week was really awesome, social-wise. Nobody started shit with me-well, once, but a teacher was really near by and came to my rescue. It was nice, actually. Oh wait...but this one kid went up to me and asked me why I'm not straight...but I count that as pointless idiocy more than starting shit.

For some reason all my teachers have been assholes though, and that plus all the homework, kinda ruined my week.

Hmmm let's see...dad's back from Salt Lake City. Stupid convention thing plus too much snow here means he was gone three days longer. T___T But he apologized for making me stay here with mom. I feel only slightly guilty in saying that she's an evil bitch and that I hate her. I know she's my mom and all...but she should probably be nicer to her only son, y'know?  I wish I had a brothersisterthing to talk to. I don't really talk to anyone at school, and Iris has been working a lot lately.

Oh, but I hung out with just Kain today! I made him come over here. Mom is terrified of him...so he'll definitely be coming back. :) We just kinda chilled out in my room and watched tv on my bed. And then ate just about everything in the fridge. I guess it would be boring to most people...but it was cool, actually just hanging out with a guy. With Iris we just kinda talk, about everything, and don't get me wrong, that's amazing. But I don't know, I guess it's just nice actually feeling like a guy instead of just 'the gay friend.'

Speaking of gay...I think dad knows. I mean, I know he'd be fine with it, but it still makes me inexplicably nervous, thinking that he does. I might talk to him about it....should I? I don't know...at least mom doesn't know. She'd freak. (If you guys haven't figured it out yet, my mom is a bitch and we don't get along...at all.)

Yeahhh, I have nothing else to say. Byeee.


I'm bored! :D I think I'll post a journal about how lame/boring/suckish my life is. :D

It's 10:35 and I still haven't done my Algebra homework, nor have I even started on Biology. Mr. Walker is gonna kick my asssssssss. :D I really don't want to go to school tomorrow..but then again, when do i? I'm just hoping my mood will change, because to tell you the truth, right now I don't feel like taking anyone's bullshit. And I know that'll end badly if I'm still like this tomorrow morning. >.> I haven't missed school in a while though, so hopefully I can get mom to let me skip. :D That would be awesome.
Ooh, recently I've become obsessed with Ellen Hopkins books. >.> WHAT I'M NOT A GIRL SHUT UP. She writes everything in poems, and it's absolutely incredible! I just finished reading 'Burned' the other day, and OHMYGODDD it was just amazing.
It's about this mormon girl, and she ends up dating one of the popular/jock guys, and basically goes off the deep end and realizes that she CAN have freedom and CAN do what she wants and be like other teenagers-even if it's against her religion. Then her crazy alcoholic dad finds out about her and her boyfriend and goes after him, and he breaks up with her. She ends up getting sent away for the summer, which is supposed to be a bad thing but really is just a break from her 6 sisters that she has to take care of. So for the summer she's with her aunt, who was inactive in the mormon church. And it turns out that her aunt (father's sister) was in love at one point with the neighbor but the crazy alcoholic dad almost killed him because of it. !! Then, she falls in love with the neighbor's son, and basically she becomes a normal teenager. When she gets back, her aunt gave her a gun just in case, as crazy alcoholic dad is abusive as hell too. Then she realizes that she's pregnant, and uses the cell phone her aunt's paying for to call her boyfriend, tell him, and arrange for him to pick her up. But ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend overhears and the entire school, then town, finds out. She runs away with the boyfriend, and while being chased by the cops, they end up in a horrible car wreck and she loses the baby and her boyfriend dies. (I KNOW RIGHT?!) Then she goes to the church with the gun and it ends there. So you basically get to decide what happens.
It's just so amazing! Guh, that giant paragraph looks so nerdy...I guess I am a nerd. XD I love books! <3

Oh mann, I don't even know what to say now. XD I guess I should go then? ^_^

Welllllllllllllllllllll.........bye. :D


Hello there. :D I'm Evan. If you didn't notice that already. And....what to say. I think Brad Pitt is just about the most beautiful human to ever grace this planet. I think Tom Cruise is an alien. I watch too much TV but most of the things I watch on TV are movies. Let's see......I'm 16. I have brown hair. :D hm...my parents don't know that I'm gay. But I guess that's fine, for now...I have thick-rimmed nerd glasses that I adore. I wear a lot of v-neck sweaters, and a lot of plain t-shirts. I have my eyebrow pierced. :D It makes me happy. I have nothing else to say. Go away. Now. D:<